Being a parent can be one of the most challenging but rewarding experiences in someone’s life. Sober parenting can be a lot more challending when you add to that the daily maintenance of sobriety, and you have a situation that can be very overwhelming at times. Striking the right balance between being a nurturing and present parent and meeting your personal needs can be difficult, but it can also be gratifying. The good news is that parents do not have superpowers, but they have more power than they realize. And if you are a recovering parent, you are far stronger than you were when you were an alcoholic. All you have to do is learn how to nurture and use your power.
Sober Parenting: Making Amends With Your Children
Rebuilding trust with your kids will take time, but these tips may assist in repairing those family bonds:
- Spend quality time with your children. Focusing on your children is essential for starting the healing process. Consider this: life can be hectic, busy, and stressful; also, your addiction consumed a lot of your time. Time is something you can never get back, make plans for a family vacation, watch a movie with your kids, or schedule activities you can both enjoy.
- Limit your expectations. You can’t make people trust you. Your family may still love you, even forgive you, but your kids may not want you in their lives in some cases. You cannot expect the relationship to be completely healed or to heal within a specific time frame. You must seek forgiveness without becoming emotionally dependent on the connection to maintain a healthy recovery. Always remember that regaining trust in all things takes time and effort.
- Appreciate their perception. No matter how old your child is, you should always appreciate their perception. Your children may recognize that you are working hard to achieve sobriety, but this does not diminish their pain or ongoing confusion. Recognize that their perception of your addiction is real and valid.
- Ask for forgiveness. Although the importance of seeking forgiveness is obvious, it is critical to do so in a meaningful and genuine manner. When asking your children for forgiveness, provide age-appropriate context for why you are asking forgiveness.
- Prioritize your sobriety. While asking for forgiveness, empathizing, lowering expectations, and focusing on parenting are essential considerations, you can’t restore your relationships unless you prioritize abstinence. Healing relationships is pointless without sobriety, remember you must first devote yourself to the therapeutic process of recovery.
How to Balance Sober Parenting With Recovery
There’s good news: even though being a parent again while recovering from addiction may be difficult, there are numerous ways to make it work. When you feel like it’s too much, consider some of these tips:
Combine Sober Parenting With Your Program
If you want to keep your recovery supercharged, you must stick to a plan. If your approach requires you to attend daily meetings, you may find it difficult to fit them into your parenting schedule; however, some organizations welcome children. Take your kids with you when attending your meetings, and they will be well-taken care of while you focus on your recovery at that time.
Call a Friend
Another great approach is to contact your sponsor or another member of your support system. Daily check-ins are beneficial, you should not be afraid to call at any time you feel vulnerable.
Watch a Video or Listen to a Podcast
If you can’t attend a meeting in person, there are videotaped meetings and inspirational speakers on YouTube. Listening to a motivational podcast can be beneficial, and you can do so while doing chores or working out.
Speak With a Professional
Family therapy can be highly beneficial in re-learning how to interact with your children. Some children may also require individual counseling; there may be issues they need to discuss verbally, this would benefit from the presence of an adult the child regards as objective or neutral.
Spend Time With a Friend
Inviting a sober friend to do something, preferably something active, is another excellent idea. For example, you can take the children to the park or pool or go to a gym with child care and get a good workout in.
Join an Online Group
Virtual friends can provide genuine drug or alcohol recovery assistance. They are especially instrumental at night when the kids are in bed, and you perhaps feel like you desperately need a drink. An online chat group can help you fill that void and resist temptation.
Get Sober With Detox Nashville
Even if we were physically present, many of us were absentee parents while drinking or drugging. Remember that a little goes a long way, and being able to share your new life with your children is one of life’s greatest gifts. If you need help with recovery, Detox Nashville has various programs that can help you get rid of the nocive substances in your body and the desire to keep getting them. Our professionals focus on your well-being and are willing to assist you in retaking control of your life, so call us today at (615) 845-4747 or write us an email at info@detox-nashville.com to find out more about our services.
